Goodbye 2011

Another year, another boatload of crap! Well, not entirely, as we always get the good with the bad, and every little thing in between. This year is ending quite a bit differently than I had hoped, but if you believe that everything happens for a reason, you may actually get some sleep at night. There's something about the end of each year that brings a mixture of hope for the next year, disappointment in hopes/dreams that didn't happen in the current year, and happiness for being exactly where you are, if you're lucky.

With another year, comes another year of knowing who I am, and being okay with it. While running today, I was reflecting on a few things, brought about by a few happenings over the past week.

Label Away

Call me a liberal. I'll be okay with that and completely agree for the most part. But there are parts of me that are conservative too. My demeanor, for one. Not always, but usually. I support the death penalty, but would prefer that the sentence comes with DNA proof. No mistakes should be made. I'm okay with people having guns, but would prefer that people with mental illnesses or past criminal records do not get the privilege of owning one. Yeah, they might get them illegally, and that's their issue. Keep your guns, but don't point them at anyone in aggression. Defend yourself, fine. Keep them as trophies, whatever. Hunt with them. I don't like hunting either, but I guess I get why people do it, in a small way. I couldn't kill an animal unless my life was in danger or I was putting it out of its misery, but if that gives you a thrill, go for it. That doesn't mean I want your bloody deer meat or goose breasts in my fridge or crock pot. And don't use the "but you eat chicken" 'cause I don't. Or ham, or cow...so find another argument for that one. Call me a hippie freak, I'm okay with that too. You keep your guns, I'll choose not to, and we can all live happily, right?

Religion versus faith. HUGE difference. Faith is having faith that there is a higher power, and to me, it doesn't matter what higher power that is. That entity is who YOU pray to, who you lean on, who is by your side when you're sick or scared to death or grieving. And if you have no higher power, then it's whatever gets you through. Religion is what people kill each other over. Religion is "I'm right, you're not and you're also going to burn in hell." Religion says my God is better than yours, I interpret the bible this way and I'm only going to pull things out of the old testament or the new testament to prove how right I am. Please. This is such an incredibly personal matter. Keep it that way. Share it with your church family, but please do not shove it down my throat. If you try to convert me at  a dinner party, I will never return to your house. If you hand me religious pamphlets, I will refuse them. You have no business in my relationship with God, and I'll stay out of yours, and we can all live happily, right?

Abortion. No one likes it, duh. It's painful and gory and horrible. It is ending a life and changing another life forever. But until you've walked in that woman's shoes (and if you're a man....sorry, you just haven't and you never will) then stay out of it. It's not your business, it's hers. The argument that some women use abortion as birth control is as lame as they come. Could some women do that? Sure, I suppose. But they are few and far between, and one bad apple can spoil the whole bunch, as in many other situations. (Faking cancer, faking rape, faking a robbery, taking welfare or disability under false pretenses....crying wolf.) Could adoption be an alternative? Of course. Being adopted, I'm all for it. But it's an intense, painful, emotional 9 months to carry a child just to hand it over to a stranger. Not everyone can do it. Let's be okay with that. You don't have to like it, just get out of the way for the women who have to make that painful decision. And we can all live happily, right?

Political system - Come ON. Wow, we have a system that is so amazingly flawed, and it's upsetting to realize it probably isn't going to change anytime soon. The parties have splintered so badly and it's become slightly akin to the religious/faith paragraph. Regarding religion - it has no place in a political campaign. I don't need to know if you're Christian, Jewish, Mormon, whatEVER. You go to church? Fantastic. Keep it to yourself. Don't care. Going to church does not make you a good person, it makes you a church going person. Being a preacher doesn't make you a good person either (at least there's no guarantee.) There are plenty of crooked preachers out there. So why does it matter? Dunno. And the bigger question is why do you have to be rich to be a candidate? Have we ever had a normal, middle class candidate? All this fundraising and donating causes corruption at the very base of the system. You scratch my back and I'll scratch yours, see you in the white house. It's bullshit, and most of them are full of it. And by most, I'll say 90% at least. The lies are incredible and the skeletons in the closet? Don't get me started. Repub, Dem, whoever...adulterers, liars, cheats. Far worse than the average person because they've got more resources to dig deeper into their personal pit of evil.

Relationships. I heard recently that "every woman has the love life she wants." Meaning, those who have good relationships have set themselves up to receive them and those who don't have done the same. I'm shrugging here, because who knows. Sometimes you know you're with a schmuck and you stay, and sometimes you don't recognize a schmuck until they show their true colors. But I do believe that the older you get, the harder it is. And until people stop looking for the green on the other side of the fence, I'm not sure that most relationships stay faithful (and that includes emotional fidelity.) Most people I know have cheated. Ain't that uplifting? Merry f'ing Christmas!

But here's the good stuff.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Loving someone is no guarantee they'll love you back, but love them anyway. If you're healthy, be happy for it. If your kids are healthy and happy, rejoice. Learn your lessons with grace and dignity and always leave room for forgiveness and trust. Smile more and if you don't feel like smiling, fake it till you make it. Smiles are contagious, and we all certainly need more happiness in this world. Allow yourself to enjoy the beauty of Christmas without the commercial trappings. There's a lot of fun to be had in decorating a tree with a child or someone you love, and that doesn't cost much. Walk around to look at Christmas lights, it'll get you out after 5 p.m. And know that as long as winter feels, spring is right around the corner. Easter clothes will be in the stores by January......

Merry Christmas, and clasp your hands together real hard and pray to your higher power that 2012 will be happy, health and for crying out loud, BETTER!