Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Trust Yourself.

Just trust yourself, then you will know how to live. - Goethe

 This has been my go-to quote for about ten years now. There are times when my confidence gets shaken, and when it does, it's almost always because of the action(s) of another. The last ten years have been about becoming stronger, trusting myself, doing the best I can, being kind and giving, and removing myself from situations or relationships that eat away at my happiness. I've learned that when something is not working, it's time to make a change. The difficult part is being SURE, and then never looking back. No regrets can happen, with a well thought out decision. 

When I have found myself in a "trapped" situation (we're only trapped when we allow ourselves to be) my confidence fails me. I allow others to convince me that I lack compassion, or passion, or may be selfish or closed off. Those behaviors only show their unattractive heads when manipulation, control or being treated with disrespect walk in the door. Those behaviors are self-protective mechanisms. When we are with someone we trust, there is little need for self-protection, because people we love and trust don't take advantage of walls that have been let down.

 So for this day, I can say with confidence and with total trust in myself that:

I am a good person.

I am compassionate and giving.

I am warm and passionate and giving and receiving of love.

I will not sacrifice my integrity or identity to suit the needs of another.

I am happy. I don't need anyone to "make me happy" or to complete me. I am not here to make someone else happy. The next person to enter my life will contribute to my happiness, not deplete it, and I will do the same for him.

 Below is an excerpt from a "How to Stop Being a Doormat" article:

7. If All Else Fails

If you’ve truly done all you can to change things and to stop being treated like a doormat and nothing seems to work, then get the hell out. Life is way too short to have your experience of it and your self-esteem damaged by someone else, and sometimes you need to make a brave choice.
If you need to, be willing to remove yourself from the situation or relationship and start building the kind of life you’d love to live.

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